Sunday, January 9, 2011

What We Remember

When I was 15 I had my first job and my only form of transportation was my bike...so I rode approximately 6 or 7 miles 5 days a week one summer while I worked. I did not lose any weight, but I did decrease from wearing a size 12-14 down to a size 7-8 and felt fabulous. I bought all of my own school clothes that fall with the money I had earned, which had allowed me to buy all of the "in" clothes...and they finally fit. I remember thinking that the clothes themselves did not make me fit in any better at school that year, but my clothes did not make me stand out any more. Then that January I left the country as an exchange student for a semester. While abroad, I had not developed any healthy coping mechanisms, so to deal with my home sickness, I ate. I gained 20 pounds and went from the size 7-8 to a size 14+. I of course did not have any clothes that fit. I remember going shopping with my host mother to an outdoor market and my host mother told the sales women that we were looking for pants for me. The sales woman took one look at me and said, "We won't have anything to fit her." I have pretty much felt like a circus elephant since that day. A few pounds up or down. You can dress her up; decorate her as much as you'd like....but she's still that sad elephant.
I did find a pair of khaki pants that day. I came home after my six months abroad with one pair of pants that fit.

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